hey G-d, its me, margaret aka Patty Jr, That book is more meaningful now than ever

Gal Pal reminded of the book a year ago, and I never read it as a kid so I bought it and read it.  was like great.  forgot about it.

But these past two months though.  smh.  I keep thinking about Margaret's petition in the book.  the simplicity of her ask and the pure audacity of her words.

my words are similar.

Hey G-d, its me your servant Patty.  and I am angry.  angry at my broken body.  angry that i feel sick every day.  angry that I neglected taking care of myself.
angry at fake supportive people
angry at family
angry at some friends
angry about shit that dont concern me
angry abou the govt, healthcare, kids not having resources,
G-d I am angry for being angry

some of it is the steroids but some of it is righteous.

We aint really cool right now, Lord.
You still sovereign.  you still omniscient and omnipresent.  I am not coming incorrect before the Throne of Grace.  Im not twisted about my role and how You roll.
But Lord.  I am weary and tired.
I am limited by my circumstance and happenstance to do the things I felt you have put me here to do.

And its me.  Lord, I thought we were homies, I know that you call me friend.  But I feel betrayed.  by folks, systems and sometimes, yes, even you.

sometimes there is no praise in my heart.  and that makes me sad.

But you have been faithful even when I am not.  So thank you.

Until next time.
-Patty



Many times it be just like that.  wrestling or choosing not to wrestle with the Lord.